The Volunteer Backlash

People are amazing.  So many exciting things happen in all sorts of places that I am never at a loss for words.  Take school for example.  So many exciting things happen in schools and if you are a nerdy little Nancy Drew like myself, all that learning and to-do lists makes me mad for it - in a good way!

Recently, I had an amazing day. I offered to help one of the teachers with an important opportunity for the juniors and seniors of our school. When you volunteer for field trip duty, you never know what the outcome is going to be. Sometimes you show up and they don't need you.  Often, you volunteer to drive or bring lunches and that is all you do.  But this time, I got to wear so many hats for the sake of the students, it was invigorating.  And it reaffirmed my outlook that our nation's youth is headed in the right direction despite the misguided role models we have handed them. {You know, Madoff, Claremont-McKenna College and our nation's politicians to name a few}.

Whilst I am grateful that our own student has finally found a learning environment that satisfies all of his needs, volunteering within the classroom at the middle and high school level can be rewarding if you can find work to do. I know what my talents are: driving, administrative duties, project preparation and proctoring or chaperoning. I am not a Team Mom, a Room Mother and I will not collect, ask for or take any money of any shape or form.  Sometimes, being of assistance at school only requires asking for money whether it is in the lunch room, in the theatre or on the playing field. I find this so frustrating.

Luckily, I may have found my niche at school. It is nice to finally have an opportunity to have a teacher-parent partnership that doesn't focus on the bad behaviour and drama that surfaces at some schools especially in the lunch room and at the social events such as productions and games. And yes, I am referring to the adult drama that surfaces in these social hotbeds.  The drama of gossip, cliques, backstabbing and socioeconomic chatter that exposes the tales of deceit, laziness and general idiocy.

Let me add to the record that I am often in the middle of some of this ridiculous, hypocritical drama - I mean really, who doesn't love a good gossip session dedicated to The Real Housewives of Our School.  But what I really want when I am at our son's school, either as a parent or a volunteer, is a day filled with laughter, good natured competition or comradery and a whole lot of learning.  As I said before, I was overly enthusiastic about the morning of volunteering I shared with the juniors and seniors.  And I hope I am asked to help out again.  So in case any of the teachers, admistrators, parents and community leaders are reading this post, here is how I would like to help:

• I volunteer becuase I want to support our school community not becuase I want special treatment for my child;
• I try very hard to put myself in other people's shoes, I will try to accomodate a varied set of needs and can be trusted with tested limits of other's strengths and weaknesses;
• I will do my best job and if I mess up, I will admit I am wrong and will try to learn how to be better the next time;
• In the same vein, I can only work with the materials you give me. Lack of communication is the root of most of the problems. Please make it very clear what you expect from me and follow up with feedback; and
• Remember that I am a human being first and that I have feelings too.  Expecting me to read your mind, withholding important information that will help the situation or insulting my intelligence will prevent our partnership from thriving.

Whilst I still have another eight or more years to volunteer in the classroom -  I am here to strengthen the relationship between parent and teacher.  Reach out in a positive way and we can accomplish a lot together since we share the same goal: the academic success of the child.